18. The great quest of the other half

 

It's high noon and everything is quiet. I am full of thoughts regarding attitudes I had once adopted and whose truth I had deeply believed in ... My needs made me see different things in others than what they had in reality.

My intense insecurity, the deception of my feelings, made me vulnerable and ready to believe in more than what people, whom I shared my life with at times, had.

The great quest of the other half, which of course I searched for in vain, made me glamourize situations, people and patterns, and when I fell from the clouds, I hurt myself more than others who had a stronger grip. Maybe I exaggerate a little, but you do so when your sentimentalism is uncontrolled.

When things take their time distance, and when life gives its knowledge to you freely, others become open books to you, which have only one reality: the truth you experienced, the truth you ached to understand. Then the attitudes don't surprise you that easily, because they were you a little while before ... 

Nevertheless, I miss you. You are the essence of a carefree state of mind that understanding of existence brings. I love you.