46. The logic of self commitment


And just when I think I've reached some conclusion ... once again I revise truths, which I adopted a short while ago ... The family, for instance, I wonder why it's needed, since it simply imprisons you with concepts which you magnify according to your emotional structure ... and yet how many people could stand living without this delusive pattern? How many would continue this ruthless struggle, without a concrete feed back? I think that few would be able to go on, to defy this, without asking "What's the point of all this?"


That's why almost everybody enters the logic of self commitment again and again ... in the need for the furled wings to allow their "young" ones to fly more easily ... and so, through the flying of eagles they too find interest for their own course, which can be slow but is less boring: the stimulus has the power to make you think that it's worth the effort, because it's the effort of the many ... an effort that everyone understands better ...

Our great need for security and the mistakes that follow because of it, seems justified if one considers the wonderful calmness that we renounced by choosing the road of descent. The constant search for joy, which we seek on earth in vain, doesn't surprise me if I think that joy is impossible before returning to Him. The inexhaustible divine energy, which never starts or ends, is irreplaceable, however intensely one tries to do so. The enormous energy eye, which is continuously fed with light, has no face, neither can anyone touch it, see it, analyze it. It's a huge nothing that actually fulfils everything. This is also the opposite of what we consider lack here on earth ... On earth by nothing we mean the absence, the lack, the "colourless" ... This term is exactly the reality of God: nothing = presence ... completeness ... clarity.