Community Dynamics

Soulmates
Between the first and second council meetings is a period of renewal for the soul. A vital part of spiritual life between incarnations is devoted to empathetic relationships with other souls. Thus, our development as souls becomes a collective one. Part of the expression of this collectivity is the association we have with these souls in a material reality, such as Earth. During reincarnation, the closeness souls feel for each other in a mental setting is severely tested by karmic challenges in our host bodies.

I have listened to many intriguing past life love stories of soulmates who come across time and space to meet each other in life once again. Here are a few examples:

Where love was tormented; in a Stone Age culture by a lustful clan chief who took my client's mate on a regular basis and then gave her back.

Where love was deprived; from a woman who was a slave in ancient Rome serving meals to the gladiators, one of whom she loved. This captured fighter told my client he would love her forever the night before he was killed in the arena.

Where love was deprived; from a woman who was a slave in ancient Rome serving meals to the gladiators, one of whom she loved. This captured fighter told my client he would love her forever the night before he was killed in the arena.

Where love was heroic; when a Polynesian bridegroom drowned after saving his mate of a few hours-my client-after their canoe was struck by a sudden storm three centuries ago.

Where love was deadly; when my client, a German husband in eighteenth-century Europe, stabbed his wife in a fit of jealous rage over her alleged affair. Falsely accused by local gossips, she died proclaiming her innocence, saying she loved only him.

Where love was unforgiving; by a returning Civil War veteran whose lonely wife, my client, had married his brother a year after the veteran was officially declared dead.

All the couples listed above are happily married to each other today. Their past trials in each life prepared them for the next and strengthened their bond as soulmates.

There are many tests wrapped in the package of love. Mixed into those lives where we have had a long and happy life with a soulmate are those lives where we have destroyed the relationship or been devastated by the actions of our soulmate toward us. In the difficult lives with soulmates something stood in the way of an acceptance of love. Being with soulmates can bring joy and pain, but we learn from both. Always, there are karmic reasons behind the serious events involving relationships in our lives.

I had a client, called Valerie, who lived the life of a beautiful woman in China two centuries ago. In that life she rejected her primary soulmate, the man she most cared about, because he argued with her and refused to feed her vanity while others did so. "Besides," Valerie told me in trance, "he was so ungainly and rough-looking I was embarrassed to be seen with him because of what others might think. Out of pride, spite and feelings that I was being taken for granted, I married a handsome man who catered to my whims. I lost the happiness that could have been mine."

In her next life, in nineteenth-century America, Valerie was the daughter of a Cherokee Indian chief who ordered her to marry the son of another chief as part of a treaty arrangement. This man repulsed her physically and made her life miserable after she assented to her father's wishes. The warrior she loved in her own tribe was the rejected soulmate in her China life. Upon returning to the spirit world after her death as an Indian woman, Valerie told me:

"My love and I could have run away together. Aside from the great danger of this act, something inside told me I had to endure what my father had set in motion. I see now that it was a test. We have the capacity to severely hurt the person who loves us and also ourselves in the bargain. My life as a Cherokee woman was a reminder of my pride and vanity as a Chinese woman."

Being with the "wrong" person for a period in your life does not mean that time was wasted. The relationship was probably intended in advance. In fact, you might see this soul again in the spirit world in a different light. This was true of the man my subject was forced to marry in her Indian life. His soul belonged to a neighboring group to Valerie's own. The soul of both men Valerie loved in her past two lives is again united with her in the twentieth century as her husband. I should add that Linda, who is Valerie's best girlfriend today and a member of her own soul group, was the eventual mate of the warrior she loved in the Cherokee Indian life. After our session, Valerie grinned while telling me, "Now I know why I have always been a little uneasy seeing Linda around my husband."

Before go further, it would be a good idea to consider some ramifications involved in the magical experience of meeting a soulmate. When I first sit down with a client and we establish a rapport, I will ask about prior and current relationships that have had significance in their life. In this way I acquire a feel for the cast of characters who exist in the play of their current life. Since I am going to be sitting in the front row as this play unfolds during hypnosis, I want a theater program.

Once in a deep trance state, many soul connections will become clear. People in my client's cast may be lovers, devoted friends and relatives, mentors or associates. Our relationships with people take many forms in life and usually involve souls from other groups as well as our own. Usually, clients have a strong desire to identify these soul connections in their current life, although most already have a good idea who they are.

In a broad sense, love is endearment, which can take many forms in life. There is always a mental connection of one sort or another with a soulmate, regardless of the role they play. We connect with people on many levels for a multitude of karmic lessons in every life. When friendship catches fire it turns to love, but without abiding friendship deep love cannot thrive.
This is quite different from infatuation, which exists on a superficial level where we have those nagging doubts about whether the connection has any real meaning. Without trust, intimacy suffers and love cannot grow. Love is the acceptance of all the imperfections of our partners. True love makes you better than you would be without that person in your life.

People often equate love with happiness. Yet happiness is a state of mind that must develop within you and not be dependent upon someone else. The most healthy kind of love is one where you already feel good about yourself and so extending your love to someone else is totally unselfish. Love takes hard work and continual maintenance. I have had numerous divorced subjects who learn that their first loves were primary soulmates. Things might have worked out if they both had tried harder.
On the other hand, there may be reasons why we might not meet our primary soulmate until later in life. Soulmates will from time to time separate for a life or two and not appear at all. "My soulmate and I were becoming too dependent upon each other, we needed to grow a while on our own" is a statement I often hear when soulmates are apart. Every era on Earth is different as to the sort of attachment and experience we will have with a soulmate. However, each life with them builds upon former lives.
We learn valuable lessons from broken relationships. The important thing is to move on in life. Some clients may tell me before their session that true love seems to elude them. After the session they usually understand the reasons behind this situation. If the right love for you does not come along, liberate yourself with the understanding that you may be here to learn other lessons. We mistakenly assume people who choose to live alone are lonely when actually they have rich lives that are calm, reflective and productive. Connecting with someone for whom you have no feelings just for the sake of not being alone is more lonely than being by yourself. This kind of love is a fantasy because it's driven by an addiction to have love at any price. If your soulmate is supposed to appear they will come into your life, often when you least expect it.

Over many years of exposure to souls in the spirit world I have developed a means of classifying soulmates. I find the position of souls within one of three categories bears upon their relationship to us in the drama of life. Our guides and beings who come from spiritual areas far from our own are not included in these three divisions.

Primary Soulmates
A primary, or principal soulmate is frequently in our life as a closely bonded partner. This partnership may be our spouse, brother or sister, a best friend, or occasionally a parent. No other soul is more important to us than a primary soulmate and when my subjects describe lives with these souls as their mates most will say their existence is enriched beyond measure.

Companion Soulmates
Our primary soulmate is our eternal partner but we have other souls in our primary cluster group who can be called soulmates. Essentially, they are our soul companions. These souls have differences in character and a variety of talents which complement each other, as my case histories illustrate. Within this cluster group there is usually an inner circle of souls who are especially close to us, and they play important support roles in our lives and we do the same thing for them. This number varies but the average client has from three to five souls in their inner circle.

Affiliated Souls
This classification of souls pertains to members of secondary groups outside our own primary cluster but located in the same general spiritual vicinity. Many of these groups work in classrooms near us. There are certain affiliated souls in other groups who are selected to work with us whom we come to know over many lives, while others may only cross our path briefly. Quite often our parents come from one of these nearby cluster groups.
Although they are not really companion souls, they do form a large pool of people available for casting calls by our directors in the life to come. A soul affiliate might have a specific characteristic that is exactly what is needed to bring a karmic lesson into your life. They are very likely to incarnate as people who carry strong positive or negative energy into their association with you. These decisions depend upon advance agreements between all parties and their respective teachers as to the benefits and disadvantages of certain character roles.

The role can be very brief. The reader may recall the bus stop incident related by the subject in case 39. The assistance given to the woman in that case was more likely spontaneous, and I feel this subject was a non-affiliated soul. I will cite an example of a brief positive contact reported to me by a subject who met a clearly defined affiliated soul:

"I was walking alone on a beach, totally devastated after being fired from my job. A man appeared and we struck up a conversation. I did not know him and was never to see him again in that life. But that afternoon he came up to me with ease and we talked. I felt myself unloading my problems on this stranger. He calmed me down and gave me greater perspective of my job situation. After about an hour he was gone. Now I see he was an acquaintance in the spirit world from another group. It was no accident we bumped into each other that day. He was sent to me."

However, it is with soulmates that we have our most profound contacts. While considering this book, I was asked by people to be sure and give them one detailed case of a love story between primary soulmates. Being a romantic myself, this request was irresistible.

Case 46
However, it is with soulmates that we have our most profound contacts. While considering this book, I was asked by people to be sure and give them one detailed case of a love story between primary soulmates. Being a romantic myself, this request was irresistible.
Three months before, on a computer website, a group of some twenty-five people interested in life after death formed what is known in computer parlance as a "chat room." Maureen said that she and a man named Dale found they were so closely attuned in their discussions about the topic of soulmates they felt connected in a strange way. She added that it was uncanny how Dale mirrored her thoughts. They decided to set up their own private chat room for further computer conversations.
Maureen and Dale learned that they were born only a few months apart fifty years ago in an area around San Francisco. They talked about their unsuccessful marriages and a mutual feeling of unexplained sadness about seeking something neither had ever found that would open their hearts. Their conversations mostly centered around life after death and Dale mentioned reading my work. Soon, the two decided to meet each other in California and see me for a combined regression session at the same time.

I agreed to an appointment date that turned out to be the day after they first met. They arrived at my office starry-eyed and I remarked that they were already in a trance state and didn't need me. The moment they saw each other there was instant recognition. Maureen said, "The way we smiled at each other-the expression in our eyes- the sound of our laughter together-the connecting vibrations as we shook hands-created a euphoria that was so strong we were oblivious to everything going on around us."

I will relate this case from the standpoint of Maureen, since she was my initial contact. During intake, I learned that there had been times in her life when she had a feeling of deja vu when she heard music from the 1920s or saw dancers do the Charleston wearing flapper dresses from that era. Maureen also told me that since childhood she had been bothered by a recurring nightmare of sudden death.

Upon my direction to move to the most significant scene in her past life, Maureen took me to the events leading up to her death. What follows is a condensed version of Maureen's story.
Dr. N: Are you a man or woman?

S: A girl, really.

Dr. N: What is your name?

S: Samantha. Sam for short.

Dr. N: Where are you and what are you doing at this moment?

S: I'm at my bedroom dressing table getting ready to go to a party.

Dr. N: What is the party all about?

S: (pause, and then light laughter) It's ... for me, today is my eighteenth birthday and my parents are giving me a coming-out party.

Dr. N: Well, happy birthday, Sam. What is the date today?

S: (after a brief hesitation) July 26, 1923.

Dr. N: Since you are at your dressing table, I would like you to look in your mirror and describe to me what you see.

S: I'm blond, with my hair up high tonight. I'm wearing a white silk gown. It's my first real grown-up party dress. I'm going to put on my new white high-heeled shoes.

Dr. N: You sound smashing.

S: (with a knowing smile) Rick better think so.

Dr. N: Who is Rick?

S: (now distracted and flushed) Rick is ... my guy ... my date for tonight. I've got to finish my makeup, he will be here soon.

Dr. N: Listen, Sam, I'm sure you can talk to me while finishing your makeup because I don't want to slow you down. Tell me, are you serious about Rick?

S: (flushes again) Uh-huh ... but I don't want to appear too eager. I'm playing hard to get. Rick thinks he's the cat's meow, but I know he wants me.

Dr. N: I can see this is an important party. I suppose that he will be honking soon for you to run out to his car?

S: (annoyed) Absolutely not! Oh, he'd like that, all right, but he will ring the doorbell in a proper fashion and the maid will let him in and make him wait downstairs.

Dr. N: So the party is some distance from your house?

S: Not too far-it's in a posh mansion in downtown San Francisco.

Dr. N: Okay, Sam, now move forward in time to the party downtown and explain to me what is going on.

S: (bubbling) I'm having a wonderful time! Rick looks gorgeous, of course. My parents and their friends are telling me how grown-up I look. There is music, dancing ... a lot of my friends are congratulating me ... and (my subject's face grows dark for a fleeting moment) there is a lot of drinking my parents don't know about.

Dr. N: Does this trouble you?
S: (fighting off a new set of feelings by quickly running one hand through her hair and returning to the moment) Oh ... drinking is always a part of these affairs-it makes us gay and carefree. I'm drinking too ... Rick and some of his friends snuck in the liquor.

Dr. N: Move forward now to the next significant event this evening and explain what is taking place.

S: (subject's face softens and her voice is more halting) Rick and I are dancing ... he is pressed so close to me ... we ... are on fire ... he whispers in my ear that we must get away from the party to be alone for a while.

Dr. N: And how does this make you feel, Samantha?

S: Excited ... but something seems to be holding me back ... I overcome it ... I'm willful. I assume it's a feeling of my parents' disapproval ... yet, I sense it's something more. I shake it off in favor of the excitement of the moment.

Dr. N: Stay with this emotion. What happens next?

S: We leave by a side entrance to avoid being seen and go to Rick's car. It's a beautiful new red roadster convertible. It's a marvelous night and the top is down.

Dr. N: Then what do you and Rick do, Sam?

S: We get in the car. Rick takes the pins out of my hair so it will blow free. He gives me a deep kiss. Rick wants to show off ... we roar out of a long driveway into the street.

Dr. N: Can you describe the location of the road and the direction you take?

S: (now growing very nervous) We are going south down the Pacific Coast Road out of San Francisco.

Dr. N: What is the ride like for you, Sam?

S: (for one final fleeting moment the subject is free of her premonitions) I feel so alive. It's a warm night and the wind in my hair blows the strands all over my face. Rick has one arm around me. He squeezes me and says I am the most beautiful girl in the world. We both know we're in love.

Dr. N: (I notice my subject's hands now start to shake and her body grows more rigid; I take her hand because I suspect what is coming) Now, Samantha, I want you to understand that as you continue to talk to me I will be with you every step of the way so I can move you quickly through anything that may happen. You know this, don't you?

S: (faintly) Yes ...

Dr. N: Move to the time when things begin to change on this drive with Rick and describe the action.

S: (subject's entire body now starts to shake) Rick has been drinking too much and the road is getting more curvy. The turns are sharper and Rick only has one hand on the wheel. We are near a hilly section ... close to the ocean ... there is a cliff... the car is all over the road, (now shouting) RICK, SLOW DOWN!

Dr. N: Does he?

S: (crying now) OH, GOD, NO. HE WON'T! HE IS LAUGHING AND LOOKING AT ME AND NOT THE ROAD.

Dr. N: Quickly now, Sam-keep going.

S: (with a sob) We miss the next curve-the car is in space-we are crashing into the ocean ... I'm dying ... the water ... so cold ... can't breathe ... Oh, Rick ... Rick ...

We stop while I begin rapid desensitization of this traumatic memory while at the same time bringing Samantha's soul out of her physical body. I remind her she has been through physical death many times before and she will be all right. Samantha explains that she is reluctant to go because her young life was only starting. She didn't want to leave Rick but the pulling sensation away from the ocean was "too insistent."
When I began my research on the soul, I assumed that when two people such as Samantha and Rick died together they would also enter the spirit world together. I have found this not to be true in death scenes, with one exception. Small children who are killed with those who love them rise with that person. Even primary soulmates killed at the same moment will normally rise up by separate routes on their own vibrational lines. I felt that this loss of companionship was a little sad until it was made clear to me that souls are met by their guides and friends from the spirit world at the appropriate time and place. Each soul requires their own rate of ascension, which includes orientation stops and energy rejuvenation, even if they are returning to the same soul group. This was true for Rick and Samantha.

Dr. N: Do you see Rick anywhere?

S: No, I'm trying to resist the pulling which wants me to turn around and face upwards. I want to continue to face the ocean ... I want to help Rick.

Dr. N: Does the force eventually turn you around in the proper direction away from the Pacific Ocean?

S: (subject is now quiet and resigned, but mournful as well) Yes, I am now far above the Earth.

Dr. N: (this is a question I usually ask people) Do you want to say goodbye to your parents before going further?

S: Oh ... no ... not right now ... later I will ... now I just want to go.

Dr. N: I understand. Tell me, what do you see next, Samantha?

S: The eye of a tunnel ... opening and closing ... coordinating its movement with my movement. I pass through and feel much lighter. It's so bright now. Someone in a robe is coming toward me.

After the sessions with Dale and Maureen were completed, I met with these primary soulmates for a review of what we had learned. Maureen explained that whenever she drove down Highway 1, south of San Francisco, she would inexplicably get very nervous and apprehensive at a certain section on the coast road. Now she knew why. I hoped my deprogramming of her death scene in 1923 would also clear up the recurring nightmares of sudden death. A month later Maureen wrote and confirmed this nightmare was finally gone.

The wonders of synchronicity became evident in this case when Dale told me that one of the reasons he left the area where he was born was because he felt uncomfortable driving around San Francisco. You would think that the time we spend in the spirit world between lives should eliminate all residual effects of our past life experiences. In most cases it does but, as I have said, some people do carry physical and emotional body imprints from one life to the next. This is especially true if that imprint bears upon a particular karmic lesson in the life to come.

Why were these primary soulmates separated in their current lives for fifty years? To understand this we must start with the dynamics of their cluster group. Dale and Maureen come from a level I soul group. In varying degrees, these twelve souls are intense fighters and risk takers. Their guide regularly takes them to nearby groups just so they can see how other groups function with more peace and harmony. Dale and Maureen told me these visitations were interesting but they found peaceful souls "sort of boring." Certainly, there are members of their group who are less restless, but Rick/Dale isn't one of them.
In his current life he was an Army Ranger who served three tours in Vietnam. "I didn't expect to come back," he told me, "and that would have been okay." Because he likes living on the edge of danger, he left the service after the war because being a peacetime soldier was too dull.

After the car crash in 1923 the group's senior guide picked up Rick, who spent considerably more time in debriefing and orientation than did Samantha. When he did return to the group, Rick was very chagrined. In a tender scene of energy caressing, Rick told his primary soul-mate how sorry he was for cutting off her young life. It was not clear from the session just how much they both knew about the possibility of the crash in advance. They have been lovers in numerous past lives, many involving turmoil. Although Dale and Maureen incarnated at the same time in this life and in the same place as their life in the 1920s, they were not destined to meet while young. The same sensory experience and emotional energy from this geographical location simply were part of the conditions for meeting much later in their current lives.
These soulmates both knew going into their current life that conditions would not be right for their meeting until many years had passed. Dale especially needed to feel the frustration of years of longing for the right woman to come along. He is not a careless, irresponsible man today. Samantha/Maureen also required the maturity she did not yet possess in her relationship with Rick in the 1920s. Neither Dale nor Maureen take life for granted at this stage of their conjunction. They have both been through considerable heartache without each other. My work with this couple ended with both essentially making the same declaration. Maureen said, "We are completing our healing by a clear respect for the sanctity of life and importance of forgiveness. Now that we both know the meaning of loss, we are going to treasure the time we have left together in this life."

Before closing this section on soulmates, I should add that many soulmates have a preparation class just before their next incarnation. A feature of this dress rehearsal with our guides is a final review of important issues in the life to come. One aspect of this prep class might also include two soulmates going off alone and sending visual images to each other of what they will look like in their new human bodies and under what circumstances they are going to meet. Here is a short example of a soulmate discussing meeting his future wife:

"I was permitted to see my wife in the screening room for the next life. She was an attractive aerobics instructor who I would meet in a gym. I studied her body and facial features carefully because I didn't want to mess up our meeting, as I had done in my prior life. The scent of her body bathed in sweat was embedded in my mind ... her gestures ... her smile ... and most of all her eyes. The moment I saw her in this life it was like two magnets pulling together."

Reuniting with Souls Who Have Hurt Us
Now that we have an idea of the roles different soulmates can play in our lives, I want to discuss a specific aspect of these associations that is of interest to people. I am often asked what it is like to see someone in our soul group right after a life where they have hurt us in some way. The philosopher Heidegger said, "No one else can love for you or feel your pain." This statement may be true on Earth, but not in the spirit world. Souls are capable of getting into the minds of their friends and feeling just what they feel. They do this for reasons of empathy, a desire for understanding and to evaluate the disruptive behavior of each other in the last life.
In case 47, I have chosen a man who had a rough start in his last life with an abusive, tyrannical father who was never satisfied with anything he did. For simplification, I will use the Earth names of these players with my subject being Ray and his father as Carl. Ray was a troubled boy who grew up lacking self-worth and his entire adult life was spent trying to conquer these negative feelings. Ray hid his sensitivity from others by building protective walls around himself. What happened when father and son met again in the spirit world is the substance of this case.

We are going to sit in on what Ray called "a motivational critiquing session" with Carl. The opening scene begins innocently enough with the usual greetings extended to an arriving soul by members of a cluster group.

Case 47
Dr. N: As you draw closer to these souls, how are they arranged in front of you?

S: Mmm ... sort of a half circle with me coming into the middle. My guide Ix-Ax is behind me right now.

Dr. N: That's usual at this first reunion, Ray.

Note: The first person to come forward and greet us after a life is always a soul of significance.

Dr. N: That's fine. Does this soul appear as a male or female to you, or is the soul genderless?

S: (tenderly) It's my wife, Marian.

Dr. N: And what does she do right now?

S: Cups my face in her hands ... she gives me a soft, gentle kiss and then hugs my head.

Each spirit has their own style of greeting for the incoming soul. After Marian, Ray's grandmother wraps her energy completely around him lovingly, as a cloak. Then, his daughter Ann comes forward. Part of her energy is still on Earth because her current incarnation is not yet complete. Despite this reduction in energy mass, Ann clasps Ray in an exuberant rocking motion while laughing at his unsettled demeanor.

As we progressed around the clock, I noticed that my subject grew more uneasy. I suspected an important member of the group was not yet in Ray's line of sight. As we neared the end of the circle of souls, the mood began to change when Ray encountered what I call "the hunkering down syndrome," which is caused by one soul hiding behind another. Sometimes the act is playful, rather like hide-and-seek, but not in this case.

Dr. N: Is that everybody?

S: (twisting uncomfortably in my office chair) No ... I see a shadow behind my Aunt Bess.

Dr. N: (after calming and reassurance) Ray, tell me exactly what happens next.

S: I see a flash of light now. (with recognition) Oh ... it's my father ... Carl. He is hiding behind the rest. He wants to be last. He is avoiding me. He is embarrassed at the lightness of the moment-all the hugging, laughing and excitement going on. My father doesn't feel like participating in this right now with me. (darkly) Neither do I.

Note: A little further on in the session I make the transition back to the soul who was Carl.

Dr. N: I want you to move forward to the time when you talk to Carl. Try to give me the details of just how your conversation with him unfolds.

S: We soon get to this ... the critiquing of what took place and why ... talking about our attitudes and judgments. Marian and Ann are there, and Carl is still chagrined. He starts by saying, "I was too severe with you as your father. I know what we planned got out of hand. That life-it just got away from me ..."
Dr. N: What does this admission mean to you, Ray?

S: (with a sense of revelation) Carl's soul is not like the alcoholic, abusive man who was my father ... oh, I see some similarities ... but his innate goodness was shut down. He was not able to control the obsessions of this body.

Dr. N: Forgive me, Ray, but aren't you making excuses for his performance? I mean, Carl had lessons to learn too, didn't he?
S: Okay, he volunteered to join with a body prone to emotional outbursts. Besides the plan of making things deliberately hard for me, he wanted to see if he could better moderate a body prone to violence. Carl's previous life was one of excesses. He admits this last life we had together did not work out well. Carl did not do the right thing by me or himself.

Dr. N: (pressing) You still don't think Carl is excusing what he did to you as your father because of his body type?

S: No, you can't get away with that here. Carl is explaining that he failed me in many ways this time around, but he learned from the life and he asks me if I did too. (pause)

Dr. N: Please continue with this, Ray.

S: (a deep sigh) I can see all his anger is gone and this is strange to me now because I haven't yet gotten used to his real self... but it won't take long.

Dr. N: As you consider all this, Ray, what negative inclinations does the soul of Carl have which carry into his incarnations?

S: He knows it is the desire to control events and people around him. His past life as my father fed into those tendencies. Both of us have trouble in life with confrontation. This is why we work so well with Ann and Marian. They seem to diffuse life's frustrations so much easier than we do.

Dr. N: Let's return to the circumstances which led to your need to be under the control of a stern father who was supposed to make things deliberately hard. Even if Carl had not gone overboard in his assignment, I don't understand why you volunteered to be his son.

S: (laughs) For that you would have to know our guide, Ix-Ax. He uses humor rather than being overly preachy. He doesn't push us hard as an authority figure because Carl and I react badly to a firm hand. Ix-Ax nudges us while letting us believe all the ideas we get come from our own perceptions, (pauses) Ix-Ax allows me to think I am getting away with something and then he tweaks my conscience. He is a coach, not a director.

Dr. N: Well, I'm glad to get that information about Ix-Ax, but how does all this relate to you and Carl and this past life of a damaged relationship between you?

S: (patiently) In my life before the last one with Carl I was an orphan and got into some bad habits. I lost my real identity in that body. It was a wake-up call.

Dr. N: In what way?

S: I had no directional support as a kid. My mother had died. Being alone as a kid can make or break you. The trouble was ... as I grew stronger and more self-reliant, I had little concern for others. I created a life of taking and giving back little. I felt people owed me.

Dr. N: Look, Ray, do you have to go to such extremes? How about having a loving father in the life you planned with Carl to compensate for the one before as an orphan?

S: (shrugs) Too easy. After my life as an orphan, Ix-Ax asked me, "I suppose now you are ready for a life of being pampered by indulgent parents?" I said to him, "Say, that doesn't sound bad at all." Then he added, "Shall we also arrange for you to be an only child of wealthy parents?" We had some fun with this scenario for a while with Carl entering into the discussion with a few quips about wanting plenty of money as my rich father in order to play the horses. He loves horses.

Dr. N: So how did you and Carl finally come around to making the decision to have a stressful life together?

S: Ix-Ax knows us so well. I am too far along for a soft-soap approach to life. In the end we asked him for assignments together in a difficult environment.

Dr. N: Didn't things go from bad to worse for you as far as loneliness and alienation in your last two lives? I'm wondering if you and Carl learned anything from having such a poor relationship as father and son.

S: (pause, while rubbing his hands together in thought) Yes and no. It's true I let my alienation in both these past lives serve as an excuse for a lack of real progress but at least I had a father in my last life who didn't leave. I did better with Carl's abuse than total abandonment in my life before Carl, when I was an orphan.

Dr. N: That's not much of an endorsement. Was the soul of Carl your father in your life as an orphan?

S: No.

Dr. N: What was your primary lesson in the last two lives?

S: To keep my identity, no matter what the adversity. This will make me a stronger soul.

Dr. N: I'm sure it will, Ray. But I should think you might consider slowing down now and then and take easier lives as a change of pace. Would it be so bad to catch your breath and build a stronger foundation for identity retention in future bodies?

S: (clearly upset with this suggestion) No! I told you I can do this and Ix-Ax knows it, too. My strength is perseverance in fighting adversity. My life with Carl as my father was a recovery test from the previous life as an orphan and it was not a failure for me. (forcefully) I learned plenty for the next life and I tell Carl this to make him feel better.

Dr. N: How do the two of you bring all this to some sort of resolution in the spirit world?

S: (in a softer, more contemplative tone) When we are alone we agree to exchange the energy of our thoughts and all the memories of that life together.

Dr. N: Is this the full mind exchange I have heard about?

S: Yes, every particle of my identity as Carl's son in that life is transferred to Carl while he projects all his memories as my father to me. It's very subjective-and that's good. In my group we call this passing the cup of sorrows.

Dr. N: And is each perspective totally honest?

S: There can be no deception here.
Dr. N: Does this exchange last long?

S: No, the transfer is brief but complete. Then we know all the trials and burdens, pain and anger-the drives-from the other's perspective because it is like actually being inside their old body. We become the other person.

Dr. N: Does this mind exchange bring forgiveness?
S: It is so much more than that. It is an indescribable melding of two minds. We can both experience the circumstances which led the other to make certain choices. I feel Carl's lack of fulfillment and he feels mine. Once the exchange is made, it cuts so deep forgiveness toward another isn't necessary. You forgive yourself and then we heal each other. Understanding is absolute. We will try again in a different life until we get it right.

After some initial awkwardness in the spirit world following their last lives together, Ray and Carl were relaxed and happy once again in their soul group. This does not mean that Carl's conduct was quickly exonerated in the spirit world. During his life review and evaluation, before he saw Ray, Carl was keenly aware of the excessive pain and hurt he had wrought upon Ray. There are two forces at work here. The first is the potential subversion of the soul's full character by the biophysical attributes of a host body, along with the effects of specific environmental influences. The second factor is the role they were each assigned to play out in the stream of karmic causation.

Each life is a piece of fabric which makes up the whole tapestry of our existence. If a family member or friend is harsh and uncompromising, or perhaps weak and emotionally distant toward us in life, we are only seeing an external portion of the entire true character of that soul. Role assignments in life all have purpose. If you grew up with a particularly difficult parent, as Ray did with Carl, ask yourself this question: What did I learn at the hands of this person that has given me wisdom I would not possess if he or she had never been in my life?

Ray has had his difficulties in his current life with chemical dependency and obsessive behavior. Yet, at age 45, he is drawing on his inner resources and turning things around, from what Ray has told me, getting in touch with his true soul identity in our session together has been very helpful. The soul of Carl is now my client's older brother, who was not easy on Ray when they were growing up. Many of the same relationship patterns are being played out today as in the past. Even so, these two souls have been far more engaged with each other as brothers than they were as father and son.

By not burying unpleasant memories in this life, Ray's soul lives in a mentally healthier body. This time around the soul of Ann, a principal player, is Ray's mother rather than a daughter. She provides a different generational dimension to his current life. Gershen Kaufman has written that "shame is a kind of soul murder." One of Ray's issues is the handling of shame. Shame brings a numbness to our minds because it ushers in feelings of nonacceptance, of being no good and having no validity. It may be so overpowering as to preclude any soul progress in a human mind that has shut down. However, Ray is an unusually determined soul who, as we have seen, won't give up these hard lives for an occasional rest. He grows stronger by building on each hard life.

By not burying unpleasant memories in this life, Ray's soul lives in a mentally healthier body. This time around the soul of Ann, a principal player, is Ray's mother rather than a daughter. She provides a different generational dimension to his current life. Gershen Kaufman has written that "shame is a kind of soul murder." One of Ray's issues is the handling of shame. Shame brings a numbness to our minds because it ushers in feelings of nonacceptance, of being no good and having no validity. It may be so overpowering as to preclude any soul progress in a human mind that has shut down. However, Ray is an unusually determined soul who, as we have seen, won't give up these hard lives for an occasional rest. He grows stronger by building on each hard life.

Interaction Between Soul Groups
Visits between soul group members are selective and designed for specific reasons. Since such visitations are by invitations emanating from teacher-guides, they are the exception rather than the rule in the spirit world. When souls arrive near the end of their level II training, they begin to push very hard. It is during this time when my subjects most frequently talk about the opportunity of visiting other cluster groups. The client in my next case had the following to say about one of his visits.

Case 48

Dr. N: Why did you want to visit this nearby soul group?

S: I come from a less serious group than many. I like to visit with this cluster because they are slightly ahead of my own. It helps my game of life to be around better players. Most of them are about ready to move up into independent study and they are very determined. I tell them a few jokes about my group to loosen them up and they give me practical ideas.

Dr. N: Do you visit with them often?

S: No, we know how busy everyone is and I respect that. I don't like to interrupt them too much.

Dr. N: Tell me about your last visit and what took place.

S: (pause) They were in the middle of a heated discussion. One of their members, called Orick, was going over a dream sequence he had from an incarnation that recently ended. Orick thought they might like to know about this incident.

Dr. N: An incident involving a dream by Orick when he was last in human form on Earth?

S: That's right. Someone out of incarnation in his group had sent Orick information while he was asleep that his human mind misinterpreted.

Dr. N: Well, was that the fault of the sender-this discarnate-or Orick?

S: You must understand the group I am visiting are pros at this sort of thing. They don't like mistakes. They are a very serious bunch.

Dr. N: Please go on. What did you learn from the retelling of this incident by Orick about his dream?

S: The morning after his dream on Earth, Orick said he went into deep meditation to try and sort out the message he had received during the night. I guess it was too muddled in his human mind to make much sense. Orick was lightly chiding his friend-the one who sent the message-that he ought to perfect his message-sending through dreams.

Dr. N: What did the sender of the dream say to Orick?

S: He said in an offhanded way, "No, you just translated the information I sent you in an imperfect fashion and then you acted wrongly on your own misinformation."

Dr. N: And what did the group you were visiting conclude from this discussion between Orick and his friend?

S: I think everyone decided that even though two souls are very close the imperfect aspects of the receiving human brain can screw up any transmission. The safe thing for a soul in the spirit world to do is transmit more than once and not rely on one medium, such as the dream state. Also, to keep the messages short and very clear.

Dr. N: So, this was a productive visit for you? You learned something?

S: I always do. Mostly I keep quiet and listen with this particular group. The discussion about transmitting spiritual messages was useful to me and I took what I learned from this visit back to my group for study.

Recreational Activities in the Spirit World
Quiet Solitude as R&R

Because the work activities of soul groups is demanding, there are souls who prefer settings of solitude during their off time. We all know people who prefer to be alone rather than socialize. Many of us become so distracted by the hectic roles we play in life, it is difficult to learn who we really are. Certainly, most souls rejuvenate well with some solitude. Yet I have encountered certain souls who seem to require regular periods of seclusion mixed with group class time. A client made the following symbolic statement:

"I am called the Wreathweaver by my group. I like to be by myself so I can see myself. Within my quiet time, I construct circular bands of energy-weaving them together as a tapestry of my lives and that of my six closest friends. I display the diversity of our life experiences by weaving different materials-attributes of energy- which represent the trappings of people and events. To execute this properly I must have total concentration"

My subjects say that the desire for time alone in the spirit world comes from an intense need to dwell within the sacred confines of pure thought to try and touch the Source from which they sprang. Many say they have profound moments of success but it is intense work. I have found that some of these ascetic souls have trouble participating in group activities and will shun recreation periods because they prefer contemplation. Despite their detachment during training, down the line these souls are capable of making great contributions in their specialty areas.

Going to Earth for R&R
There are souls who come to Earth as invisible beings between lives so they can re-experience former physical environments. The only problem with this is they must return to chronological time, which means these souls are caught up with change since they were last here. A soul described returning to Earth on a vacation trip and running into other discarnates, some of whom were disruptive. This factor, plus not wanting to dilute old, original memories, can dissuade souls from coming back to Earth between lives. There are souls who find this sort of nostalgic trip to be unrewarding and even frustrating out of a physical body. This situation does not apply to those souls who come back to comfort and aid loved ones and are not motivated by a desire for recreation.

From what I have observed, it is change that seems to have the biggest impact on the vacationing soul. Many won't return to Earth for recreation between lives because of the day-to-day modernization of the communities they once occupied. In dimensions away from ground zero on Earth, images of places and the people who once lived here are frozen in a timeless vacuum that never vanishes from existence. The patterns of energy particles representing moments in human history can be retrieved at will by souls who are out of absolute physical time.

Nonetheless, there are souls who still want to come back for planetary visits, despite the negatives. My next case is one of those souls who enjoys roaming around his old haunts on Earth.

Case 49
Dr. N: What do you find most enjoyable as a recreational activity between lives?

S: I like to come to Earth.

Dr. N: Where do you go?

S: I loved the beaches of southern California in my last life. So I return to sit on the sand in the sun, walk the beach among the sea gulls, and be in the surf. My passion are the waves-the feeling of movement and the crashing foam.

Dr. N: How can you fully experience all this at the beach without a physical body?

S: I take just enough energy with me for the experience but not enough to be seen.

Dr. N: I have been told that on many recreation jaunts a soul might take 100 percent of their energy. What do you do?

S: We don't do this on Earth because it would not be fair to scare people. I bring no more than 5 percent, usually a bit less.

Dr. N: Are you capable of riding waves?

S: (laughing) Absolutely, why do you think I come? I also soar with the birds and play with dolphins.

Dr. N: If you were a spirit sitting on the beach enjoying the sun and I walked past you, what would I see?

S: Nothing, I am transparent.

Dr. N: Would that mean if I were strolling along the beach would I just walk through you in your space without sensing your presence?


S: Well ... a few people might sense something but they would probably dismiss this as a figment of their imagination.

Dr. N: Could you go to other physical worlds to experience what you have described?

S: Yes, but I loved this area and I have been here in more than one life. That is why I return. For me the sea is part of my soul. I could go to other water worlds, or create all this in the spirit world, but for me this would not be quite the same thing.

Dr. N: Where are your other favorite spots to play based upon your former lives on Earth?

S: Around the Mediterranean and Aegean Seas.

Case 50
Dr. N: Kimoye, what do you like to do for recreation?

S: Frankly, I am a rather quiet, unsocial soul and I enjoy doing two things. I garden and play with animals during the time I am away from my group.

Dr. N: Do you actually grow things in the spirit world?
S: Creating living things from energy is one of our important exercises here.

Dr. N: Tell me about playing with the animals.

S: I have a dog and cat as well as a horse. These are my pets from the last life.

Dr. N: Do they just appear when you want them?

S: No, I must call for them as they don't normally live in our spaces here. I can't go to their place. An Animal Caretaker brings them to me. We call them trackers.

Dr. N: Meaning the tracker has to find your pet and not one created out of energy, as you might do with a plant in your garden?

S: Absolutely.

Dr. N: Do animals have souls, Kimoye?

S: Yes, of course they do, but in many varieties.

Dr. N: What is the difference between animal and human souls?

S: The souls of all living things have different ... properties. Animal souls have smaller particles of energy ... less volume and are not as complex and multifaceted as the human soul.

Dr. N: What other differences do you know about between the souls of humans and that of animals?

S: The main difference, other than size and capacity, is that animal souls are not ego-driven. They are not overwhelmed by identity issues as we are. They also accept and blend with their environment rather than fighting to control it like human beings, (stops and then adds) We can learn from them.

Dr. N: You said that animal souls had their own domain in the spirit world. How then are you able to associate with them even with the help of a Caretaker Soul?

S: (perplexed with me) They have sensory energy on Earth like us ... we share their physical existence ... so why not the mental ... ?

Dr. N: Well, Kimoye, you did say they have a different arrangement of properties than our intelligent energy.

S: So do my plants, but I am not denied their company if I wish it.

Dr. N: You mentioned that you play with your dog. Can plant energy become dog energy?

S: No, because each form of life does have its own assortment of energy-this energy does not cross the line into another physical form on the same planet.

Dr. N: Does this mean a cat won't transmigrate into a higher form of life and a human being will not become a lower form, say in the body of a cat, in a future life?

S: Yes, that's right. Energy is created and assigned to certain physical and mental forms.

Dr. N: Why is that, do you think?

S: (laughs at me) I don't know about the grand design here, except that mixing soul types is not expedient.

Dr. N: Tell me, Kimoye, do you see the animal souls of your pets in groups such as that of your own soul group?

S: Like I said, I don't go to their places. They have no need to call for us to come to them. I can't tell you about these areas except to say the Animal Caretaker told me there is a general division of land, air and water groups.

Dr. N: Are any connected with each other in the spirit world?
S: It is our understanding that whales, dolphins and seals are together-crows and hawks-horses and zebras-that sort of thing. Animals have their own connections with community bonding by general species that we are not supposed to understand-at least I don't.

Dr. N: Well ... ?
S: (breaks in) I guess if we needed to know we would be told.

Dr. N: Okay, now let's go back to your original statement about playing with your pets during recreation time. Could you have a wild animal such as a wolf?

S: Only if the wolf was domesticated.

Dr. N: Can you explain this to me, Kimoye?

S: (subject frowns in concentration) The associations with animals need to be productive in certain settings for us to be motivated to work with certain life forms. My dog on Earth can be with me within my spiritual property where I built my house and garden because it is natural for him to be here. He belongs with me because we were bonded playmates. Our mutual love and respect for each other on Earth is being renewed because it is good. There is beauty in this for both of us-this must be why it is permitted.

Dr. N: Could you differentiate between the soul of a domesticated animal on Earth and one that was wild?

S: I think so. As I said, animal souls are much less complicated than human souls. The domesticated ones are able to extend love and affection to humans, which we need. The wild animal souls are not as focused in this area and don't understand us very much at all. Most cannot be constrained-and shouldn't be, just because we share the same environment.

Dr. N: Do you think there is more need for freedom with the wild animal?

S: Maybe, but the souls of all living things-especially us- require freedom of expression. With the domesticated animal soul, they are more willing to give up some freedom to bond with humans in exchange for love, affection and protection. There is a symmetry in having pets.

I once asked a subject who was knowledgeable of the skills this specialty required about my old basset hound, Socrates, a much loved family pet for fifteen years. My question was that if my soul mind could create a house and a physical body for myself between lives, could I conjure up my dog? I was told the following:

"You could do this if you were advanced enough in the creation of energy. But even if you had this ability, your dog would not be quite as real as a professional could do for you. An Animal Caretaker Soul has the skill to track and find the spark of soul energy which did not die with Socrates and reconstruct your dog exactly as you knew him on Earth. Your pet will know you and be able to play with you whenever you wish and then he will go."

The Space of Transformation
During their long apprenticeship of training, souls are able to study and practice many arts. In order to capture the essence of all living and even nonliving things on Earth, souls are able to meld with multiple substances. This would include fire, gas and liquids. They may also become totally amorphous in order to meld with a feeling or emotion to become one with that state.

The next short case is an illustration of how the Space of Transformation tempers and strengthens the soul mind in a process of mental annealing.
Case 51
Dr. N: Why have you come to the Space of Transformation?

S: There are periods when I am away from my soul group and I wish to experience what this room has to offer. I enter the energy screens here to absorb my energy into the strata of compassion. I am drawn to this energy stream ... it is part of my soul.

Dr. N: Please explain this stream of energy to me.

S: They are specific belts of purified energy. I blend with the one of compassion.

Dr. N: Who creates this particular belt for you in this space?

S: I don't know. I enter and mentally concentrate on what I want and it is provided for me. As I practice, the more potent this energy gets, and the more benefit I receive.

Dr. N: I don't see why it is necessary for you to come to this place to experience compassion when you can get that from going to Earth.

S: Yes, but you must understand that when I go to Earth and devote my energy to the healing of others, my energy loses much of its integrity by the end of my life. This is because I am inexperienced as a full-fledged healer.

Dr. N: Well, if you are here for that sort of rejuvenation, why don't you give me a more precise example of what you do in the Space of Transformation.
S: (takes a deep breath) I can identify pain, but in order to diffuse it in the human body I assimilate it. This eventually makes me ineffective. I become a sponge rather than a mirror of light. Here I can practice my art.
Dr. N: By doing what?

S: I learn to manipulate my energy rather than absorb pain. The energy belt of compassion is like a liquid pool where I can swim and become part of the emotion in an experience which is so subjective I cannot describe it to you. It assists me in working on calmness within a sea of adversity. It is wondrous ... it is ... alive.

Dancing, Music and Games
Dancing and singing in unison brings a feeling of oneness with all thought. From my research, I have come to believe that more than any other medium, music uplifts the soul with ranges of notes far beyond what we know on Earth. People in deep hypnosis explain that musical thought is the language of souls. The composition and transmission of harmonic resonance appears to relate to the formation and presentation of spiritual language. Far beyond musical communication, I'm told spiritual harmonics are the building blocks of energy creation and soul unification.

Many souls enjoy singing in the spirit world but it took me years to find a soul who is a Musical Director. My next case is a subject who has had a multitude of past lives where he was connected to music in one form or another. In his last life he was an Italian opera singer in the 1930s.

Case 52
Dr. N: What is your major recreational activity in the spirit world?

S: To create music.

Dr. N: You mean with musical instruments?

S: Oh, there is always that-you can pull any instrument out of thin air and play it. But, for me, there is nothing more satisfying than creating a choir. The voice is the most beautiful of musical instruments.

Dr. N: Look, you don't have the vocal chords of an opera star any longer, so ... ?

S: (laughs at me) Has it been that long since you were a spirit? No human body is needed. In fact, the sounds we create are lighter and of much greater range than those on Earth.

Dr. N: Can everyone sing the high and low notes?

S: (with enthusiasm) Of course they can. We all have the ability to be sopranos and baritones at the same time. My people can hit high and low notes and everyone is always on pitch-they just need a director.

Dr. N: Could you describe what you do?

S: (quietly, without boastfulness) am a Musical Director of souls. A singing conductor-it is my passion-my skill-my pleasure to give to others.

Dr. N: Are you better at this than other souls because of your musical talent in your past life as an opera singer?

S: Oh, I suppose that one follows the other, but not everyone is as focused on music as I am. Some souls in musical groups may not be paying attention to the entire score, (smiles) Because of the musical range possessed by souls, they need a director to keep all these virtuosos on track. After all, this is recreation for them. They want to have fun as well as produce beautiful music.

Dr. N: Then all this is vastly different from working with a choir on Earth?

S: There are similarities, but here you have so much talent because every soul has the capability for perfection of musical sound. There is high motivation.

Dr. N: If you were to look into the deeper motivations for souls, can you help me understand why music is so important for them in the spirit world?

S: It takes you to new mental levels ... moving your energy communicating in unison with large numbers of other souls.

There is a remarkable consistency to game descriptions by subjects in hypnosis. While we can take the memory of a game with us to the spirit world, it is my belief that certain games with origins in the afterlife are brought to Earth and modified from unconscious memory for use in a physical body.

During my early research, I had no idea of the many ramifications of spiritual games. They all have their own distinctions that give pleasure. Eventually, I realized some games could escalate into training exercises and that individual souls from many groups gravitated to this activity. One game stands out in my mind in this respect.

I find the hide-and-seek game to have significant implications for future traveler souls. The execution of this game offers a variety of proficiency levels in teaching spatial frames of reference to interested souls. I began to take notice of this particular game after I heard about the appearance of coaches when the game became more complex. My clients call them the Game-keepers. These are the specialist trainers who will expose those adventuresome beings who show talent to trips into different dimensions. Here is a quote from a highly advanced soul who wishes to specialize as a traveler:

"Hide-and-seek in the spirit world begins as an exercise between light and darkness. With the younger souls we charge up our energy from a distance and then wink it out when the kids come in our direction. We block and then open up our telepathic energy at the same time to mix up the visual and mental signals. In the beginning we create doorways of light within structured columns of energy which are employed as shadowed panels which may be arranged in parallel or horizontal lines. Later we make them random geometric patterns. Most young ones have a terrible time learning to detect and find us as we dart between the doorways, but they have fun because at this stage they still consider this playing a game.
Some become so good we can't trick them anymore. In time these souls-those that want to continue- become trainees and are ready to be ushered into our playground of interdimensional zones, which are divided by energy barriers and vibrational pulse rates. This is tough because the trainees must learn to adapt to different wave configurations which exist within each dimension and match their energy quickly to pass through. We lose many souls at this point who don't wish to continue.
The work is like being in a hall of mirrors. The souls like me, who refuse to quit because we love the work, must now master the mental dimensions without structure or form. They exist as vacuums between the physical dimensions. Part of me still considers this training as recreation. It is so captivating I can't wait to get back home and engage in this exercise again with my friends."


Four General Types of Souls
Before moving on to a discussion of the more advanced souls in the next chapter, I should list the major types of souls I have encountered within the community of spiritual life. There must be many more than these four categories of souls, however, I am limited by the memories of my clients concerning other possible soul types in the spirit world.

1. Souls who are either unable or unwilling to function individually. These souls usually work within collectives and never seem to leave the spirit world. Even so, I am told all souls are given the opportunity to experiment with existing in both physical and mental universes.

2. Souls who do not wish to incarnate in physical form. Also, they may not possess the requisite properties of light energy to engage in this activity. They seem to work only in mental worlds and appear to move easily between different dimensions. Most of their talents are beyond the comprehension of my clients.

3. Souls who incarnate only on physical worlds. I sense that some have the capability for training in mental spheres between lives, but are not inclined to do so. They are not attracted to interdimensional travel, even during recreation. Quite a number of my clients are in this category.

4. Souls who have both the ability and desire to function in all types of physical and mental environments. This does not necessarily give them more enlightenment than other soul types. Yet, their wide range of practical experience and capabilities position them for many specialization opportunities involving varied assignments of responsibility.

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